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Question: Lately, I have been feeling very sad. My father died several months ago, and I seem to be having a difficult time getting back to normal. Could this be depression? Answer: Everyone feels sadness and grieves the loss of a loved one. That is expected. Usually, these feelings of grief lessen on their own over time. It may take awhile, but grieving is a normal, natural process. However, significant life changes and stressors can be factors in bringing about depression. Depression occurs when these feelings of extreme sadness last for at least two weeks or longer and when they interfere with daily life activities. These impacted activities can range from working to eating and sleeping. Depressed individuals often feel overwhelmed, exhausted, helpless, and hopeless. Withdrawing from family and friends is not uncommon. At times, the depressed person will blame themselves for their depression. They think they "should be better" and wonder why they "can't deal with things anymore." This leads to a feeling of guilt which, in turn, leads to increased despair and worsening depression. This may be the bridge between "normal" grieving and depression. Sometimes, people who are grieving the loss of a loved one do not give themselves adequate time to grieve. Trying to establish a normal life once again, they think they should be "over" the loss of their loved one and feel like a failure when they continue to experience grief. They establish a negative pattern of thinking in which they criticize themselves, which generates more feelings of hopelessness. These feelings of depression are viewed as signs of weakness rather than as indicators that something is "out of balance." It is rare that depressed people simply "snap out of it" and feel better on their own. Hope need not be abandoned. Help is available. Through psychotherapy and possibly medication therapy, depressed individuals can regain a sense of joy and management of their moods. They can see choices where they thought none existed and alter the negative thinking patterns that often accompanies depression. Depressed individuals do not have to suffer needlessly. For additional information, contact the Rice - Lewis Clinic. Answered by: Dr. Julie Howard, Ph. D. |